My Fitness Resolutions for 2010

Hey guys.  I hope you had a good Christmas and New Year.  I expect by now most of you will have settled back into work and have enjoyed the first month of 2010.  Hopefully you have all managed to stick to the resolutions you made for the year so far.  Today I am going to kick off the content on the Free Fitness Tips Blog for 2010 with a slightly belated post on whether I achieved my fitness resolutions for 2009, what my fitness resolutions are for 2010 and what topics I am planning to post on the Free Fitness Tips Blog over the coming months.

REVIEW OF MY 2009 FITNESS RESOLUTIONS

Last year I made 6 fitness resolutions…

1) TO IMPROVE MY FLEXIBILITY:- Overall, I believe I have succeeded at this resolution.  I have improved my flexibility significantly this year by staying behind at the gym after finishing my main workout and doing an extra 10 minutes of stretching.  Whilst I have achieved this resolution there is still room for improvement and I plan to continue stretching consistently to increase my flexibility during 2010.

2) TO DO MORE BODYWEIGHT TRAINING:- Unfortunately I did not succeed when it came to this resolution.  I started off the year by focussing solely on bodyweight training but from February onwards pretty much reverted solely to gym workouts.  So whilst this resolution was not a complete failure, taking the year as a whole I did not achieve this resolution.

3) TO DO MORE RUNNING:- I have improved massively in this area and definitely achieved this resolution during 2009. To do this I incorporated interval sprints into all my gym workouts and also managed to fit in some longer distance outdoor runs throughout the year.  This has allowed me to see huge improvements in my running speeds and cardiovascular fitness.

4) TO ENTER A 10K RUN:- Unfortunately I did not enter a 10K run this year so did not achieve this resolution.

5) TO BE MORE FLEXIBILE WITH MY TRAINING:- Unfortunately this was another fitness resolution I did not achieve this year.  Whilst I started off the year with bodyweight workouts my overall training program was not very flexible.  I spent the majority of the year working out in the gym and did not really focus on other training methods.

6) TO SLEEP MORE:- This is another area I have struggled with and a fitness resolution I failed to achieve.  The reason for this is that on work nights it can be very difficult to fit working, training and preparing my meals into a 16 hour day.

So overall I achieved 2 of 6 resolutions.  Whilst this seems low and there is certainly room for improvement, I have made progress over the year.  Hopefully, 2010 will be an even more successful year in terms of fitness resolutions.

MY FITNESS RESOLUTIONS FOR 2010

Although I did not achieve 4 of my fitness resolutions last year, I am not going to add all of these to my list for 2010 because I do not believe all of them are as relevant now.  Anyway, my fitness resolutions for 2010 are…

1) TO ENTER A 10K RUN:- Although I did not manage to do this last year, I want to enter a 10K run this year.  I believe I am physically ready as I have been running regularly and built up my fitness and stamina.  I just need to make the final push and actually enter an event.

2) TO SLEEP MORE:- Whilst I did struggle last year to get my full 8 hours on work nights it is still something I want to work towards because lack of sleep can have a negative effect on your training, your ability to build muscle and more.

3) TO BE MORE CONSISTENT WITH MY TRAINING:- Over the last few weeks I have started really well by training Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday.  However, as I get to the mid-point of the week my training starts to tail off for various reasons.  Sometimes I do not even manage to get another session in before the week is over.  Whilst this will inevitably happen sometimes I want to be as consistent as possible with my training this year and make sure that bad weeks are kept to a minimum.

4) TO GET NOTICEABLE IMPROVEMENTS FROM MY TRAINING:- One of the main problems I have with my training is that I struggle to make noticeable improvements in the long term.  This is normally caused by lack of sleep (which can hinder my performance in the gym) and inconsistency (which means that certain muscle groups can get neglected during my training so I lose any improvements in strength, stamina etc).  This year I want to get noticeable improvements from my training by improving in these two areas and also by writing notes during every workout.  This will allow me to track my progress and actually see if I am getting stronger.

5) TO BE MORE CONSISTENT WITH MY BLOG POSTS:- Regular readers of this blog will know that I am quite inconsistent with posting to this blog.  Sometimes I will do 2-3 posts a week then (for various reasons) I will have a barren spell with no posts for a month.  This year I want to be more consistent than ever and ensure that Free Fitness Tips Blog is updated regularly with fresh, unique content.

FREE FITNESS TIPS BLOG POSTS FOR 2010

Last year I did a number of detailed posts on diet and nutrition covering carbohydrates, dietary fats, protein and vitamins.  With my next few posts I want to carry on with this topic area by expanding on the subject of dietary fats and doing some new posts on the different types of minerals out there.  I also want to do some posts later in the year on some of my favourite exercises.  Hopefully, 2010 should be a great year for content at the Free Fitness Tips Blog.

Now I want to hear your comments.  What are your fitness plans for 2010?  Did you achieve the fitness goals you set yourself for 2010?  Let me know by leaving a comment.

4 Ways That Jogging Improves Your Mental Fitness

“Everyone who has run knows that its most important value is in removing tension and allowing a release from whatever other cares the day may bring.” – Jimmy Carter

In my recent articles I have focussed on jogging and the related health benefits you can enjoy by practising this activity.  In these articles I briefly covered the benefits jogging could have on your mental fitness.  Today I want to discuss this area in greater detail and provide you with four mental benefits of regular jogging.

1) IT CAN IMPROVE YOUR CONFIDENCE:- When you jog you are overcoming both personal obstacles (running faster, running longer distances etc) and physical obstacles (running up hills, running on tough terrain etc).  By proving that you can overcome these obstacles you build confidence and gain the mental strength to overcome other obstacles in your day to day life.

2) IT CAN HELP YOU OVERCOME ANGER:- Everyone experiences anger.  Anger is a natural emotion and is not inherently good or bad.  However, there are good and bad ways to deal with anger.  A bad way to deal with anger is through physical or verbal aggression towards other people.  A good way to deal with anger is exercise as it allows you to release it physically without impacting other people.

Jogging is a particularly good exercise for releasing anger as it gives you both a physical and mental release.  The actual exercise allows you to physically get the anger out of your system whilst the alone time you get from jogging provides you with an opportunity to think about and deal with the anger in a more calm and collected state.

3) IT CAN IMPROVE YOUR MOOD:- One of the most well publicised benefits of jogging and running is the “runner’s high”.  During a long distance jog or run endorphins are released and attach themselves to areas of the brain associated with emotion.  This causes many runners to experience a state of euphoria which is referred to as the “runner’s high”.  Not only does this improve your mood but it is also an effective way to combat anger, depression and stress.

4) IT CAN HELP YOU BECOME MORE FOCUSSED AND DETERMINED:- In order to constantly push yourself on long runs you need to be focussed on the task at hand and determined not to give up.  You need to be constantly pushing yourself to achieve more.  This brings about improved focus and determination.  These skills can be applied to other areas of your life and make you more successful in these areas.

As you can see jogging is not just good for your body – it is also good for your mind.  So next time you are feeling angry, unhappy or your confidence is at an all time low why not go for a jog and see what it does for you?  At the very worst you will burn a few additional calories but if all goes well you will come back feeling much more happy, confident and upbeat.

Now I want to hear your thoughts.  Are there any regular joggers out there who have experienced the above mental benefits?  Are there any further mental benefits of jogging that I have missed?  Do you agree that jogging is a good way to improve your mental fitness?  Let me know by leaving a comment.

Sources:
Endorphins & The Runner’s High (Wikipedia)
Mental Benefits of Jogging (About.com)
Running Quotes (Quote Garden)

Look Forward and Be The Change

Hey everyone.  Today I’ve got something new for you…my very first guest.  It comes from Parth Shah who runs his very own blog over at ShahTraining.com.  Shah’s blog is full of killer workout information and provides you with some fantastic training techniques.  I strongly urge you to check it out after you have finished reading his excellent guest post

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We’re going through some tough times. I can understand that. But when has the human race never faced a tough time. Just think about the events in history. The past fifty years will show you how lucky you are. Pick up the paper and see the suffering going on around the world.

I’m lucky to be sitting in a warm room with a computer in front of my eyes. I’m lucky to be able to eat warm, healthy food. I’m lucky to still be able to have a choice about the type of foods I put in my mouth.

Life requires a lot of mental and physical strength to push through it. The only way that I have moved past my bad times – when I was being mocked in middle school for my weight, when my parents disagreed with my career goals, when I just felt depressed due to a series of failures – I pushed through with the support of intense training and sound nutrition.

When you spend time improving yourself, pushing yourself through physical plateaus, you realize the amazing things that you are capable of. I follow the creed of Mahatma Gandhi:

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.”

How to Be the Change

What Mahatma Gandhi meant by this quote was to simply live life the way you want to see the world. I want to see the world healthy and fit. And so I live my life in this manner. I want to see people respect each others’ religion, background, political views, and race. And so I live my life in this manner.

Fitness itself provides a huge vehicle for change. One such example is Anne Malhum’s “Back on my Feet” program. Anne ran past a homeless center in Philadelphia every morning. One morning, she decided to motivate these homeless men to start running with her.

This seemingly simple task changed the lives of these men. The running club transformed from just 9 runners in from over 300 members in across 3 shelters. According to Mahlum, “Running is really a metaphor for life. There is always another mile. You just have to take it a step at a time.” She says that the men have not only improved in their health and well being, but also have learned life lessons such as discipline and goal setting.

The program also has a job training program, complete with interview prep and computer classes. There have been numerous success stories of the program.

Applying it to Your Life

I’m not telling you to go out and start a community program, or even volunteer in your community (but you can, if you want). I’m just trying to give you another reason to stick to your program and perhaps try things you’ve never done before.

A global recession or crisis often makes people not want to do anything. But if anything, this is the time to do SOMETHING. Inactivity or ignorance is probably why a crisis occurred. Someone somewhere wasn’t doing their job properly.

Just as in the world, what happens in life is that you become comfortable. You think things are going smoothly, so you hold back back. You settle. You let things go the way they are. You used to train five days week, but now you’re settling for three days a week, with only half the effort. All of a sudden you find yourself unhealthy, maybe even back to where you originally started.

When things go back, it’s time to move forward, not look back and sulk.

About the Author:
Parth Shah is an average joe who’s tired of all the nonsense in mainstream fitness media. His thoughts, ideas, and philosophy can be found on his website, ShahTraining.com. (Feed – http://feeds.feedburner.com/shahtraining/UQuk)

4 Ways to Motivate Yourself in 2009

Today I want to write about a topic that I feel is quite important if you want to succeed at anything – motivation.  Whether it’s a fitness plan, a new diet, being good at your job or anything else in life you need to be motivated to succeed.  In my last post I discussed my fitness resolutions for 2009.  What I failed to mention in that post is the need for motivation in all of them.  Writing a list and saying you want to do this, this and this is easy.  However, actually having the motivation to do the things on that list is not so simple.  To explain this concept further I want to share with you a little story about this list…

My second resolution on that list was to do more bodyweight training.  To keep up with this resolution I wanted to continue doing an outdoor bodyweight routine that I had put together whilst stopping over at my parent’s house (I will be discussing this workout in my next post).  Now I really am not a fan of cold weather so exercising outdoors is not usually my first choice.  However, there were two big factors that pushed me towards this type of workout.  First, I did not have access to a gym and still wanted to do something to keep myself physically active.  Secondly, I was on holiday from work during the Christmas period so I could get myself nice and warm in the house before stepping outside which made the whole routine a lot more bearable.

Next week I return to work full time which means I have two options when it comes to this workout:

1) Get up early and do this workout before work.
2) Do this workout in the evening straight after work.

I presently live in Salford, UK and anyone who has been there will know that it is not the kind of place you want to be jogging around in the evening.  This leaves me with option 1 as my only realistic choice.  Since I am starting work on Monday I decided that on Saturday morning I would get myself up nice and early and do this workout.  I could then repeat this on Sunday and be ready to face the early morning workouts during the week ahead.

Come Saturday morning my alarm went off.  I actually wasn’t that tired but it was very cold so I hit snooze to give myself 10 more minutes to warm up.  The alarm went off again and I needed another 10 minutes.  In the end I did not get out of bed early and had to do the workout in the afternoon.  Since it was a Saturday this was not a massive deal because I had the whole day to workout.  However, if I do this on Monday morning I will have to go to work and the opportunity to workout will be gone.

This got me thinking why I didn’t get out of bed when the alarm first went off?  Sure it was cold but during this time of year it is going to be cold all day.  When I cut out the excuses I realised that it came down to one basic thing – I wasn’t motivated enough.  Once the alarm goes off I am awake and I choose whether to get out of bed or stay in it.  I cannot control the weather and so should not be using it as an excuse but control whether I get out of bed.

Now that I had established I was not motivated enough to get out of bed I started thinking of ways I could motivate myself.  Luckily for me a lot of the fitness blogs I read have been posting about this very topic.  Today I would like to bring all this fantastic information together and share with you some of the best motivational ideas from around the fitness blogosphere:

1) LISTEN TO SOME INSPIRATIONAL MUSIC OR WATCH SOME INSPIRATIONAL SCENES:- Andrew Rubalcava did a really great post entitled songs to help you kick holiday sluggishness where he listed 10 highly inspirational songs.  Some of these songs were from films such as Rocky and the Karate Kid so came with a kick ass training video.  It may sound a little cheesy but just watching these videos before working out can really alter your frame of mind.  The training videos from Rocky just make me want to get out there and emulate what he is doing – even if it is cold.  So next time you need some motivation take five minutes to listen to a song that you find inspirational or watch a short video that motivates you.  It could provide you with that little push that you needed.

My only problem with this post is that Andrew missed out one of my favourites – the training scene from Rocky 4 set to ‘Hearts on Fire’ (he had used it recently in a previous post) so I have included it here:

If Rocky can do it in the freezing Russian temperatures during the Christmas holidays then surely I can get out of bed an hour earlier in the morning

2) LEARN TO PAY THE PRICE:- Vic Magary puts it perfectly in his post How to be a Real Man in 2009.  You need to “determine the cost of what you want and then pay the price”.  I already determined the cost of doing my new workout routine earlier in this post.  The cost to me is getting up extra early in the morning.  The reason I didn’t get up on Saturday is because I didn’t want it enough.  As Vic says; “It all comes down to how much you want it”.  If I really want to do these bodyweight workouts then I will spring out of bed as soon as the alarm goes off and not reach for the snooze button.  You should develop a similar attitude when it comes to your own fitness goals.  Determine the cost (whether it be joining a gym, missing out on a bar crawl or skipping take away Friday) and then learn to pay the price.

3) DEVELOP A WINNERS MINDSET:- Rusty’s post on developing the winner’s mindset expands upon the concept of learning to pay the price perfectly.  He says that without hard work a goal is meaningless and explains how you can learn to look forward to hard work.  I feel Rusty’s got it spot on here.  If you can develop a winner’s mindset getting up early and training in the cold weather becomes a lot more bearable.  Although you will still have to pay the price of getting fit you will be much more willing to do so.  Next time I get up for my bodyweight workout I need to remember that every workout I do is going to make me stronger, leaner, fitter and healthier.  If I keep it up for a month I’m going to realise massive improvements.  Surely that is something to look forward to and enjoy.

4) TAKE ADVICE FROM THOSE WHO HAVE ALREADY SUCCEEDED:- Athletes and sports stars usually know what it takes when it comes to staying motivated.  They’ve been in situations where it would have been far easier to stay in bed or skip the workout but they didn’t.  For this very reason they have excelled in their field and become the best at what they do.  Sometimes listening to how these people have done so well can be extremely motivating.  Eartha has put together a fantastic ebook entitled 100 Inspirational Fitness Quotes which you can download at absolutely no cost to yourself.  It contains lots of great quotes and here is one of my favourites:

”I wouldn’t say anything is impossible. I think that everything is possible as long as you put your mind to it and put the work and time into it.” – Michael Phelps

This guy was a stand out performer at the 2008 Olympics.  He got there by sacrificing a lot of time and putting a lot of work into his swimming.  If I put the same amount of effort into my bodyweight workouts and you put it into achieving your fitness goals just imagine how far we could go.

Even the most positive people need to be motivated at times and I hope these tips have helped.  On Monday morning I’m going get out of bed as soon as the alarm bells ring, make myself a hot coffee (hey even motivated people can do with a quick winter warmer), watch a short inspirational video (I think Rocky 4 is going to have it all the way…that training scene never gets old) and then start paying the price (i.e. going outside and working out).  If I want to succeed with my fitness resolutions this year I’m going to need to develop a winner’s mindset.  Lying in bed because it’s cold simply won’t cut it.

My Fitness Resolutions for 2009

Hello everyone.  I hope you all had a good Christmas and wish you all a Happy New Year in 2009.  Hopefully, you didn’t party too hard last night and are able to read this post without too much trouble.  Since New Years Eve is traditionally a time when people make resolutions for the new year I thought today I would put a fitness spin on this theme and post my fitness resolutions for the new year.

1) TO IMPROVE MY FLEXIBILITY:- I’m not naturally very flexible.  I used to be very flexible in my mid-teens because I incorporated stretching into my daily routine.  However, over the last few years stretching has taken a back seat to the other exercises I do.  When I think about it my flexibility is the last thing I want to lose as I get older as it can really affect how mobile you are.  I don’t want to struggle to put my shoes on, to get dressed or to reach things that are on the bottom shelf because I’m not flexible enough.  To remedy this I plan to start making stretching part of my daily routine again.  I’ve been doing it for the last couple of weeks and have noticed the improvements so hopefully in a month or two I will be back to my mid-teen level of flexibility.  Plus, I will be doing some posts on stretching and improving your flexibility so that you guys can learn about the topic too.

2) TO DO MORE BODYWEIGHT TRAINING:- I like exercising in the gym which is fine.  However, there are undoubtedly times when I will not have access to a gym.  One such time was the past week when I went to visit my parents for Christmas.  Even though I didn’t have any gym access I still wanted to some exercise so I put together my own simple bodyweight routine which I will be outlining in a future post.  Surprisingly even though the weather was very cold I actually enjoyed doing this outdoor bodyweight workout.  So now I want to become more knowledgeable in this area and learn more bodyweight training exercises.  I will also be posting about this topic as I learn.

3) TO DO MORE RUNNING:- I used to be quite good at long distance running in my school days.    However, since school I’ve been on and off with my running.  This year I want to get more consistent with it.  I think that by doing more bodyweight training this will help as I can build running into my routine.

4) TO ENTER A 10K RUN:- Hopefully as I do more running I will get to a level where I am good enough to be compete.  When I feel ready I plan to enter a local 10K.  Not only will this give me something to work towards but it will also add a competitive edge to my training.

5) TO BE MORE FLEXIBLE WITH MY TRAINING:- As I said above I like exercising in the gym.  However, I understand that this is not the only training method out there.  In fact there may be better methods out there that I neglect because I focus on gym work.  Therefore I want to mix up my workout routine and try new things each month.  This month I’m going to focus on bodyweight training then next month I will probably go back to the gym.  The month after I will look at something new.  By training this way it should improve my overall fitness and make my workouts more fun.

6) TO SLEEP MORE:- I’ve mentioned a few times on this blog that I always struggle to get enough sleep on week nights when I am working.  Over the Christmas holidays I’ve had more free time and managed to get a full nights sleep.  This has shown me the value of getting a good nights sleep.  So during 2009 I’m going to be making a continued effort to get enough sleep every day of the week.

So there you have it.  My fitness resolutions for 2009.  I think overall I’ve led a relatively healthy lifestyle over the past year but these resolutions should give me a bit more variety and hopefully improve my fitness even further.

Now I want to hear from you guys?  Have you got any fitness resolutions for the new year?  If so leave me a comment.

4 Top Tips for Improving your Mood this Christmas

In my last few articles I have been discussing how our mood often suffers at Christmas.  Not only do we have the stress of organising gatherings with family and friends, buying presents and the cold weather to deal with but we also have an increased chance of catching the common cold or the flu.  On top of this research has shown that the lack of sunlight in the winter months can lead to a type of winter depression called Season Affective Disorder (SAD).  However, it’s not all doom and gloom.  There are a number of things you can do to ensure your mood stays positive over the festive period.  In this article I will be providing you with four top tips for improving your mood this Christmas.

1) DO SOME EXERCISE:- Exercise causes the body to release endorphins and serotonin both of which help improve your mood.  So if you are feeling down at any time over Christmas why not go for a walk or head down to the gym?  Not only will you be burning those calories away but you could also cheer yourself up.  If you can brave it then try some of these winter activities.  Otherwise read about my 6 Christmas exercise ideas to ensure that you remain active over the festive period.

2) WATCH WHAT YOU EAT:- The food you eat does not just affect the size of your waist.  It can also affect your immune system and your mood.  Therefore, try and incorporate these foods into your Christmas diet.  Not only are they healthy choices but they could have a positive impact on your mood too.

3) GET SOME QUALITY SLEEP:- Getting enough sleep is important all year round but it is perhaps extra important over Christmas.  Due to the lack of sunlight in the winter months it is often difficult to wake up in the mornings so you really need to make sure you are getting at least 7 hours a night over the festive period.  Try to have a consistent bedtime which allows you to get a good amount of sleep and 30 minutes before this bedtime start winding down by turning off electrical items, brushing your teeth, turning out the lights and getting into bed.

4) GET A LIGHT BOX:- As I said at the start of this article winter can lead to a form of winter depression called SAD.  For some people this leads to mild feelings of depression but for others it is a lot more severe.  The cause of SAD is the low levels of light in the winter months.  One way to treat this condition is to get a light box.  You then sit two or three feet away from this light box for a couple of hours each day and you should notice improvements in your mood within three to four days.

Your mood is very likely to suffer over Christmas.  However, by following the measures discussed in this article you can stay chirpy over the festive period.  Exercise regularly, eat well, get your sleep and if necessary get a light box.  Hopefully, this will lead to you having a happy holiday period.

Do you guys have any further tips?  Does your mood ever suffer over Christmas?  If so leave me a comment.

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Don’t let SAD Ruin your Christmas

The holidays are meant to be a time of joy and happiness where people come together and enjoy the presence of family and friends. However, this is not the case for everyone. For some people the reduced daylight hours and the lack of sunlight actually cause them to develop a form of depression called Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD). In this article I will be discussing SAD in greater detail and hopefully help you avoid the condition this Christmas.

According to SADA, SAD affects approximately 7% of the UK population each year between the months of September and April. It is particularly prevalent in December, January and February. For these 7% it is a serious medical condition which prevents them from functioning normally. On top of this a further 17% of the UK population are believed to suffer from a milder form of SAD which is often referred to as the ‘winter blues’. SAD can affect all people but it is most common in 18-30 year olds. It is also very rare in people who live close to the equator as daylight hours are long, constant and bright.

So what exactly is SAD? As I already said it is a form of depression that is caused by the lack of sunlight in the winter months. When night falls the pineal gland starts to produce a substance called melatonin. This tells our body clock it is night time and makes us feel sleepy. Bright daylight acts as a trigger for the pineal gland to stop producing melatonin. However, in winter there is less daylight and the daylight we do get is often dull. For some people this level of light is not enough to completely halt the production of melatonin leading to a number of undesirable symptoms associated with SAD. These symptoms include:

- Carbohydrate Cravings.
- Concentration Problems.
- Depression (which can range from a slightly low mood to complete despair).
- Irritability.
- Joint Pain.
- Loss of Libido.
- Sleep Problems.
- Stomach Problems.
- Stress.
- Tiredness.
- Weakened Immune System.

It is not known why SAD affects some people and not others but for those who do suffer the symptoms usually disappear in the first few weeks of spring in line with the brightening daylight. On top of there are a number of treatment options available. Light therapy is one of the most popular treatments and according to SADA it is effective for 85% of sufferers. This type of treatment involves purchasing a specially designed light box and then sitting two or three feet away from it for around 2 hours each day. However, this does not have to be as restrictive as it sounds. You can still perform other activities whilst receiving the light therapy, provided that you remain in a close vicinity to the box and that it is within your field of vision. Light therapy often proves effective within three or four days of starting the treatment so if you think you are suffering from SAD it is definitely an option worth considering. Other treatment options include anti-depressants and counselling.

Whether it manifests in a mild or more extreme form, if you find yourself suffering from any of the above SAD symptoms during this holiday period then you should go see your doctor right away and explain your concerns to them. SAD is highly treatable and in most cases light therapy can be the perfect remedy. Your doctor will be able to give you a fuller picture and recommend the best treatment for you. Follow the advice in this article, go see your doctor if necessary and stop SAD from ruining your Christmas.

Now I want to hear from you guys. Have I missed out any important facts concerning SAD? Have you ever experienced this condition yourself? Are there any other treatments you would recommend? If so let me know by leaving a comment.

Sources:
SAD Information (Lumie)
SAD Information (SADA)

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Overcoming Worry and Anxiety

Worrying is part of everyday life and it is inevitable that sometimes we will start to feel anxious about certain areas of our lives. By worrying it shows that we care about our personal well being and are giving it serious thought. For example, by worrying about our performance at work it shows that we want to excel in this area.

However, for some people worry becomes a serious mental affliction and starts to take over their lives. They live with constant misplaced worry and anxiety over just about any possible scenario such as; the things people say and do, the things people may do to them, what will happen if their spouse leaves them or dies and more. When the worrying gets to this level it has developed from a natural symptom of everyday life to a problem that needs to be dealt with.

There is an old saying that you should be happy and not worried. It sounds uncomplicated but it really can be the basis of a stress free life if we explore it a little further. Lets say you have a debt problem. Is there any point getting worked up about it? Instead of worrying about the actual problem wouldn’t it be more productive to try and come up with a solution? If you are in a positive state of mind the solution will come to you whereas being in a state of high anxiety will damage you both mentally and physically, plus it will not help eradicate the problem. The problem is there, whether you like it or not, so it makes sense to find a way to still be happy and appreciate all the good things you have in life such as friends and family. When you begin to generate happy thoughts, happy solutions will start to appear. This is the promise of the law of attraction – that which you desire you will attract accordingly.

Worrying too much can even create a problem which did not originally exist. For example, if you are constantly worrying about your job security this could lead to you becoming unemployed because you have developed a negative attitude or your people skills have suffered. You would lose your job because YOU anticipated it and then YOU made it happen by worrying. Instead of worrying about job security you could think positively about your job performance and look at how you could improve your interactions with people, perform your work to a higher standard and be more confident in the job. By thinking positively you are likely to improve your standard of work which will indirectly improve your job security. Contrastingly, worrying can have a detrimental effect on your job performance and in the worst cases lead to you losing your job.

If you look to the past and remember all the times you have worried, how much good has it actually done you? Worry is a baseless fear that will stop you from leading a happy life. Life is for living – not worrying. The secret to a happy life is creating harmony in your environment and anxiety does not promote harmony. You should always live in the present and plan for the future, but do not let the future control you. If you make a choice to accept your problems and not worry about them you will place yourself in a much more positive state of mind and in turn be more likely to find a realistic solution. It sounds simple, but both worry and happiness are states of mind which you have full control over. If you make the right mental choice, then you will open the door to a happy, fulfilling, stress free life.

 

6 Suggestions for Overcoming Loneliness

Loneliness, isolation and rejection are feelings shared by people across the globe. Just because you are physically isolated it does not mean that you will automatically experience these feelings. Being alone can be a beneficial and enjoyable experience if it is a situation you choose to be in. Loneliness, isolation and rejection are feelings of disjoint from others, which can sometimes be damaging. These feelings often lead to people becoming scared of being alone. In this article I discuss how to identify if you have a problem regarding feelings of loneliness and how you can overcome such a problem.

The feelings of loneliness, isolation and rejection are often linked to personal insecurities and poor self esteem rather than physical loneliness. If you feel this is the case with you, then you need to start looking internally at the possible basis of these feelings. Some useful questions to ask yourself include:

- Does being on your own physically mean you are unloved or unwanted?

- Do you feel like a social outcast just because you do not have a partner?

- Do you feel like you need to enter into new relationships quickly even if this means undergoing lots of heartache and pain?

As you can see from the nature of these questions a lot of people move from relationship to relationship because they are looking for an answer to their state of disconnect. They feel that by being in a relationship, even if it is not the right relationship, they are no longer alone. However, this is not a realistic solution to the problem. Below I have outlined six effective ways you can remove this feeling of disconnect from your mind and destroy your fear of loneliness:

1) FIND A PURPOSE IN LIFE:- This should help fill the gap in your heart an make you feel a greater sense of worth.

2) IMMERSE YOURSELF IN A CAUSE:- This will enable you to feel and show both compassion and kindness. By giving yourself to the cause you will feel extremely needed and wanted.

3) ADOPT A PET OR TWO:- Caring for pets will reduce your feelings of loneliness because there is now a living creature out there that depends on you.

4) PICK UP A HOBBY AND PUT PASSION INTO IT:- By doing this you will be too busy to be lonely and you may also meet some people you can connect with.

5) PICK UP A READING HABIT:- Reading will expand your mind and lead your thoughts away from feelings of isolation and rejection.

6) FEEL GOOD ABOUT YOURSELF:- Regardless of your physical condition, your financial circumstances or what others say about you, YOU have to start thinking about yourself positively. This will really help you rise above the negative feelings that destroy your sense of belonging.

By implementing the above steps you should restore some of your passion for life. In doing this you will no longer rely on other people for personal happiness. By discovering your own self worth you will instead find motivation from within, and your thoughts and actions will no longer be driven by the fear of loneliness.

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If you have tried the above suggestions and still feel lonely you may want to read Admirable You, a simple guide to building self confidence, believing in yourself and making new friends.

10 Tips for Coping with Grief and Loss

Grief is an incredibly agonising human experience but also a natural reaction to loss. In life it is almost inevitable that we will experience grief and loss. Although it is a painful experience, grief is also a process that gives us strength to take on the challenges we face in life.

People cope with grief in different ways. Some can overcome it relatively quickly whilst others take time to get through it. However, it is important that when those that are close to us experience grief we help them. In this article I discuss ten ways that we can help those close to us get over grief.

1) DO NOT SAY YOU UNDERSTAND HOW THE PERSON FEELS:- Even if you have experienced the exact same losses as the person who is grieving you can still not truly understand how the person feels. As stated above, people handle grief differently so their experience will be unique to yours.

2) AVOID CLICHES:- For example do not try and tell the person that time will heal the wounds. For some people this may be true but for others the hurt will always be there.

3) AVOID TELLING THEM TO BE STRONG:- People who are dealing with grief are very vulnerable. Telling them to be strong is an unnecessary burden.

4) LOOK FOR SIGNS OF A PROLONGED PROBLEM:- You need to understand the grieving process and if you see signs of a long-term problem developing then aid the person accordingly.

5) WRITE A PERSONAL NOTE WHICH DISPLAYS COMPASSIONATE KINDNESS:- Written words are permanent and can be a real source encouragement for the griever in times ahead.

6) MAKE YOURSELF AVAILABLE:- Sometimes the person who is grieving just needs you to be there and offer a listening ear or a shoulder to cry on.

7) ENCOURAGE THE GRIEVING PERSON TO WRITE DOWN THEIR THOUGHTS:- This is a powerful way to get the grieving person to release their emotions and not keep them bottled up. It can be a great healing process.

ASK WHAT YOU CAN DO:- People who are grieving may care less about day-to-day activities such as cooking, shopping or housework. Therefore, you can offer to do these tasks for the person whilst they grieve.

9) UNDERSTAND THE IMPORTANCE OF THE LOSS:- Make sure you do not trivialise the loss in the words you use to communicate with the person who is grieving.

10) SHARE YOUR FEELINGS ON LOSSES YOU HAVE EXPERIENCED:- In doing this you can empathise with the person who is grieving. Whilst you are not telling them that you understand what they are going through, you are making the attempt to connect with them.

When suffering from grief people often feel isolated and alone. If they choose to be alone then you should respect that. However, you should not avoid the subject completely. By talking about it you are showing that you truly care for the person and you want to help them get through it. Continue to show kindness and this will go a long way to helping another human being get through a dark period in their lives.

 

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